Saturday, February 20, 2010

A Little About Virgil

Marcel emailed me about Virgil, but then called me to make sure I got it because time is tight.  He and Marty have arranged poker night with Virgil tonight.  Needless to say, I'll report later how it goes.  As for now, here is what Marcel knew about his neighbor.

1. Mid-fifties.  If he's a drinker, possibly mid-forties.  If he moisturizes, possibly mid-sixties.
2. Heavy: beard.  Heavier: eyebrows.  Heaviest: backs of the hands.
3. Very rarely has visitors.  When he does it's a young woman who is dressed very, very elegantly.  Possibly a daughter or a prostitute.
4. Seemingly unemployed based on number of blaring ads in the day for mesothelioma lawsuits.
5. Dress and size lead one to believe his parents were a log cabin and an axe handle.
6. In regards to the night terrors: has them at night but sometimes during the day.  Often times he just wails and moans, but sometimes shouts, "One day, yes!", "No flowers! No flowers!", and "God knows! God knows! God knows!"  Very often he shouts, "Hazel! Your eyes! Hazel!"  Marcel pointed out that although hazel might be the least horrifying eye color, it nevertheless sounds awful in Virgil’s nightmare.
7. Sometimes during nightmares walks about the apartment.  Occasionally goes through drawers.
8. Comes back with Arby’s 3 to 4 times a week.  I therefore asked Sammy if he might know the man.  It’s possible Sammy said, but he small talks with every regular customer.  Although most of his regulars are very hairy and open to escort services, this man doesn’t ring a bell.
9. From their apartments both Marty and Marcel can hear the sound of frying food but never smell food frying.
10. Has never gotten something from his mailbox that he didn't immediately tear into small pieces and shove into his pocket.
11. Has never smiled at Marcel.  That's just not right.  Seriously, you should see this guy.